I'm BAAACKKK! yahoo!

I guess I need to give u some history before I can share my great news of my comeback, so here goes...

Last Friday, I cried myself to sleep.

After having a very unsuccessful time of trying on all my summer shorts and capris, that did NOT fit! Very upsetting. I've been fooling myself that everything was ok with my fitness level and weight because those jeans I bought this winter still fit, albeit a bit tighter, but they still fit, so I was fooling myself that I wasn't gaining weight and all was ok. Well, its not ok. All my other jeans, that are a bit smaller don't fit at all, so I have to wake up from this delusion and face the facts that I am gaining weight because I am eating crap. Too many sugary snacks, ice cream, and cookies. I still work out, but not as intensely as I used to during the great year of 2007 ( my awesome year when I got to 135 pounds and was NOT on a diet, it was simply that I ate good food and not crap, and worked out like a maniac).

So that did it. I got mad. I only see REAL results when I get mad. I haven't been mad lately because as you've seen from my previous posts I've been pretty happy just coasting. Sure I wanted to lose a few pounds but I wasn't upset enough about it (because those expensive jeans still fit) in order to make any serious effort. My husband is right, I'm a yo-yo in my fitness regime and therefore a yo-yo in my weight. Nothing extreme like 100 pounds, but within 15 pounds either way. Doesn't sound like too much when u watch Biggest Loser, but for me 5 pounds is a jean size, so 15 is actually pretty significant. Its the difference between wearing clothes in my closet, or not even fitting in them because they are so disgustingly tight its pathetic. I personally hate it when my pants get so tight in the thighs that there is a little 'window' u can see through right at your crotch (because my inner thighs are sticking out and thus touching) ugh! yuck! I HATE that! Other people probably have other areas that bother them more, but since I gain weight in my thighs and butt first, those are the areas that piss me off when I see them grow. So as u can tell, I am MAD! And fortunately, that means good things for me...

Saturday I woke up and I made a change. A change in attitude. A change in my mind. A definate new motivation. So, I say... I'MMMMM BBAAAACCCKKKKK!!!!!!!!

The following is my intake and cal burn for the last few days. (u can scroll quick if u don't care-its sort of just for me to keep me accountable. I didn't look up all the cal counts on the foods yet, and I may not. When I did that in the past it became a bit too controlled. I just want to make wise choices to put good things in my mouth, and when I do make a decision to eat something unhealthy I want to do it in moderation so that there is no regret.)

Sat:
880 calories burned: fun run, treadmill run, AMT
2 cups cheerios/skim milk
1 C strawberries
2 slices english muffin bread (YUM) with 1T butter (about 240cal combined)
3 carrots
2 small croissant turkey,sprouts,pickle,1slice salami sandwiches (I know,croissants are the worst bread choice, but I really like them).
dinner out:3 C tabouli
5 grilled shrimp
2 fried shrimp
1 baked potatoe with chives,cheese,& butter

Sun.
423 calories used on bike and short run, plus did 30minutes with the weighted hula hoop
1C cheerios w/ skim milk
banana
1 C raspberries
2 sandwiches(like yesterday)
1C tabouli (brought some home from the restaurant)
2 grape tomatoes
1 string cheese
1/2 cinn roll (100 cal)--I nibbled on the girls' that I made them-shouldn't have-wasn't worth it.
1 t butter
2C spagetti squash w/salt/pepper

Monday
540 calories used on treadmill and AMT
1C cheerios w/skim milk
banana
1C tabouli
1/2C strawberries
1 mini snickers(after I ate it I craved more sugar-yuck, so I ate more berries instead :)
4 hard boiled egg whites
2C grapes
porkloin/roasted
6 carrots
1 potato with butter and salt/roasted

Tues:
1250 calories on AMT and gym classes, plus digging in yard to make garden
1C cheerios with milk
2 bananas
2C strawberries
2 sloppy joes
salad + olive garden italian dressing(big cal on the dressing, but this is the only dressing that I use a lot of, usually I just eat my salads without dressing)
apple
2 oranges
3 celery
15 cheese crackers(organic) 130cal (this was my snack/treat bc I was starting to crave something, so I counted out the serving size of 15 crackers instead of eating the whole bag which I have been known to do in the past.)

So there you have it. Not 100% perfect (fried shrimp, dressing, butter), but lots of really good healthy stuff (egg whites, fruits and veggies). I wanted to have zero sugary snacks for at least 3 days straight to break the craving that sugar does in your body, I caved with the snickers and the bites of cinn roll, but I don't feel bad, its still pretty good and I made wise choices to go for the berries when I wanted sweet things, and maintained portion control on my cracker snack. So I feel I am doing good and headed on the right path. If I stay motivated (and mad ha ha) my eating habits will change (like they did before) and I'll only desire the good food, and the mozzerella sticks and ice cream won't even be tempting me anymore. That's my goal, to get back to a complete change in food intake. I know exercise is important, but as anyone who works out a lot like me knows... what really dictates your body shape and size is what u put into it. That is my main goal to focus on that. I did have great gym workouts and I feel the intensity returning to my workouts, so that is good too.

By the way, I don't think I mentioned it, but when I was trying on the clothes that were too tight I got on the scale afterwards and sure enough I had gained 5 pounds and was now at 150-ugh that makes me mad!!!!!
After 3 days of refocusing my food intake to healthy things I am already back to 145. Now my goal is to work towards my 2007 weight of 135 again. Help me on my journey, will ya? :)